Forrest City Plans Purchase of Another Former “Landing Strip”

GOP contender Newt Gingrich has big plans for his future potential presidency. He would like to colonize the moon by 2020. This plan may seem unrealistic to some, mostly because we last landed there in 1972 and currently don’t have a space program. However, there are those that believe it is possible, and want to make sure they are cashing in on the opportunity. “We believe this is absolutely going to happen,” says Forrest City President Phil Dargossi. “We need to stay ahead of the game, which is why we are in the process of purchasing a large chunk of the most livable moon property.” President Dargossi compares this purchase with one of the most successful development projects in the U.S. “When we purchased the property of the old Stapleton airport, most thought it could not be successful,” says Dargossi. “It was overridden in concrete, toxic waste, garbage, and worst of all, it was next to Aurora. We have made this project work through making a lot of promises to residents, some of which we keep.” Dargossi plans to contact some of the defunct Stapleton home builders to see if they are interested in getting some functional moon homes designed. “They were kind of our bread and butter at starting the Stapleton project, and they can give us a jump start on the moon project. Dargossi understands that the undertaking has several challenges. “When we first started the Stapleton project, we sold a certain vision. Now, we haven’t always followed through on that vision, which has caused some angst in the community. So, what we are researching right now is how high are expectations of people willing to live on the moon? Do they need a school and a pool in every filing? How quickly do we need to have a Whole Foods in their town center?” Forrest City plans to complete the purchase after choosing their site using old Hubble photographs. Design on community layout will begin immediately. Dargossi expects the community makeup to consist mostly of “people willing to live on the moon.”]]>

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