Tires Plus Celebrates Screwing of 10,000th Stapleton Customer

It took ten years and a lot of hard work, but the Stapleton Tires Plus finally got there: screwing over its 10,000th customer. “We are really proud of what we were able to accomplish, in really what is a short time,” said regional Tires Plus manager Chris Fix. “Most companies aren’t able to screw over 5,000 customers in 10 years, we were able to double that.” Fix points out that there are several challenges in getting to that number. “Usually, bad word of mouth can destroy these efforts right when they get going,” says Fix. “Luckily, many customers in Stapleton know very little about cars, and simply take our word for it. Also, a lot of these customers are so busy, they just go to the closest place instead of driving an extra two miles to a reputable place. It baffles me, but we benefit from it.” The 10,000th customer was not quite as happy about this accomplishment as Tires Plus was. “I went in to get a simple oil change,” says screwed-over customer Claire Taylor. “Then, my check engine light came on, and I went back in again. And again, and again, and so on. It was ridiculous, and cost me thousands of dollars. I later found out from a real mechanic they were putting in used parts. I am so furious.” Fix says they will continue to screw customers over as long as Stapleton customers keep giving them the chance. “We plan to continue to screw over the people of this great community, and hope that they continue to give us the opportunity. It has truly been an honor screwing over all of them.” ]]>

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