Stapleton Mom Troubled by Lack of Catcalls in Town Center

woman-getting-catcalledRecently, the subject of “catcalls” has been in the news. A catcall is defined as when one makes a whistle, shout, or comment of a sexual nature to a woman passing by. Recently, a video released by Hollaback showed the challenges a woman may face when walking around in an urban environment. The woman received tens of comments within 10 hours. Stapleton feminists have voiced their disapproval of those feeling they should make a comment to a pretty woman every time they walk by. “Of course, it has happened to me,” says resident Kristi Gable. “It is very uncomfortable, and it is a pretty helpless feeling.” Other feminists agree. “Contrary to popular belief, it doesn’t matter how attractive the person doing it is,” says resident Julie Nuss. “It’s sad, pathetic, and horribly unoriginal. I’m aware that if you go to a bar you may get hit on, but a woman should be able to walk from one place to another without being subject to come ons.” Stapleton mom Charlene Madison disagrees. “Anyone who feels that a man hooting and hollering at you in approval is either threatening or harassment is just plain wrong,” says Madison. “I like when I am passing by a construction site and guys say something to me about how I look or how I make them feel. It is really empowering.” Other non-feminist Stapleton women agree. “Yeah, I am all for random dudes checking me out whenever and then publicly stating how they feel about me,” says Kelly Young. “It actually is quite helpful. It serves as a gauge as to what outfits work and what don’t. Trust me, the outfits that get more catcalls end up in the cycle more often.” Kathy Dart is actually disappointed by the lack of catcalls she receives when she goes to the town center. “I am married, but it is still nice to be noticed,” says Dart. “I will eat lunch, grab coffee, walk around the town center, etc., and sometimes not even have a guy turn around and look at me after I walk by. What is wrong with this community?” questions Dart. “I understand there are a lot of married guys here, but just because you are married doesn’t mean you are blind and dumb (not able to speak).” Dart is hopeful that when the Eastbridge town center begins construction, the workers down there will be able to make helpful comments. “The sooner that begins, the better. This town center is just to uppity for me, with all its not commenting on women’s hotness. Grow up people.” Dart strongly recommends that men in the town center start showing their appreciation for Stapleton hot moms because they “really do appreciate it.” Note from the Editor I’m not sure if I have ever been the “victim” of a catcall, but for the sake of being unrealistic, let’s say I have been. The difference is, men are typically more physical in nature than women (regardless of what Crossfit class they are taking) and therefore, men should rarely, if ever, feel physically threatened by a woman other than their spouse. So guys, let’s work on a more original approach to harassing women. There is no way to know the success rate of catcalls, but my guess is no one has ever been to a wedding and heard the bride say in her speech, “so, I was just minding my own business, and some random guy said, ‘hey, baby.’ Well, me and Shane have been together ever since.” Get it together fellas. ]]>


  1. As you often point out in your stories, the “hot moms” of Stapleton already know they are hot. We men don’t have to feed their egos. Besides, guys, one of those hot moms is my daughter!

  2. Sigh. Trying to let this go, but upset. Catcalls aren’t about flattery, they are about power and men’s implicit ‘ownership’ of both public space and women’s bodies. Cruel and thoughtless way to get a laugh, Mr. Asshole.

  3. I have been working in an interesting industry for 15 years and could not disagree more, men have very little power or ‘ownership’ in a public space or over women’s bodies in this day and age, at least not the men I have been introduced to in 3 major cities.
    PS: Love this : “Trust me, the outfits that get more catcalls end up in the cycle more often.”

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